This is my dream

I would sell my soul to be the T-Rex that rocks up during live shows.

I can do this.  I need to do it.

It’s why baby Jesus put me here.

T-Rex entrance from stage right at 4.25


When you see a story from the Daily Mail

Meghan Markle’s pregnancy / makeup / beauty regime.

Kate’s dresses and pregnancies.

The really really “hilarious” story about a guy that once dropped a slice of toast.

The even funnier thing with cats that say “they can has cheezburger”

The groundbreaking research that proves postage stamps cause diabetes.


This is why we can’t have nice things

“Ribbons Undone” has always made me think of my daughter cos I used to play it on piano a lot when she was a kid and her favourite line was always “She runs like the fire does just picking up daisies..”

She just had it pop up in a playlist and went “This reminds me of when you used to sing and play it all the time when I was little….naww 🙂 🙂 ”

DSCF0027Me gently playing the chords singing “She runs like a badger and looks like a pancake… comes in for a sandwich and shits in her breeches”

Cannot stop laughing at the lyrics I made up on the spot and ruined a really nice song for her.   To be fair I do love the line about her daughter picking daisies and lavender but come on… Literally right there straight off the top without thinking just BOOM!!

This will tickle me from now until about Sunday afternoon.


With very good reason to be fair.  Why?  Why would the ladies even do this?

You’ve gone through all that training and proven your salt and then you go and completely undo it all by leaving on wet undies for absolutely no reason whatsoever.

The 19yr old does a brilliant job of getting herself together and calm when she’s in the water I actually said aloud “Good lass.. well done” and then she does that and made me “What…?  Well you stupid girl”

I once had to go three hours in a pair of wellies with a split in the sole and I can tell you – not nice.  My foot felt like a wet dead cat and was shrivelled up to shit by the time I got home 😦   Wet, cold, freezing sore tits.  Barmy.

Ant is so angry.  You won’t like him when he’s annngggrry.

*I saw a black man’s bare bottom tee-hee